we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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