end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
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