Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
