Life is so much better after having sex.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize