How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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