dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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