I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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