...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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