Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
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New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
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So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?