Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'

  (810): View more from Michigan

  needless to say i wont be back home tonight

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  (810): dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?' (810): needless to say i wont be back home tonight http://tfl.nu/wf6u
  Replies (38) Good night (4888) Bad night (531)
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  (650): View more from California

  Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.

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  (650): Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us. http://tfl.nu/ztab
  Replies (31) Good night (13837) Bad night (961)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it

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  (773): I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it http://tfl.nu/9cts
  Replies (37) Good night (11346) Bad night (758)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you mean i was at the winter classic?

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  (617): you mean i was at the winter classic? http://tfl.nu/ck5g
  Replies (39) Good night (5296) Bad night (685)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Are you talking about my vagina?

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  (252): Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it (919): Are you talking about my vagina? http://tfl.nu/sfmr
  Replies (29) Good night (8748) Bad night (851)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.

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  (859): So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form. http://tfl.nu/if3v
  Replies (14) Good night (4946) Bad night (2663)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today

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  (850): I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today http://tfl.nu/9m95
  Replies (18) Good night (4594) Bad night (1041)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.

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  (636): Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape. http://tfl.nu/3ikt
  Replies (3) Good night (1785) Bad night (877)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog

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  (907): Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog http://tfl.nu/oh2n
  Replies (16) Good night (2753) Bad night (1036)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.

  (1-812): View more from Indiana

  ...the American dream.

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  (812): Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit. (1-812): ...the American dream. http://tfl.nu/qt7c
  Replies (15) Good night (3084) Bad night (664)
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  (310): View more from California

  Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.

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  (310): Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes. http://tfl.nu/zngo
  Replies (2) Good night (1288) Bad night (438)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location

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  (972): The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location http://tfl.nu/vjmb
  Replies (4) Good night (645) Bad night (250)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms

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  (917): Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms http://tfl.nu/vk6t
  Replies (5) Good night (859) Bad night (310)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.

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  (201): Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off. http://tfl.nu/s8w5
  Replies (10) Good night (258) Bad night (989)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"

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  (609): Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits" http://tfl.nu/28wn
  Replies (1) Good night (418) Bad night (158)

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