Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
sarcasm needs its own font
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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