Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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