Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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