He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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