i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
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At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
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