I'm really into asian looking animals
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
operation harelip BJ is a go
our cab driver is having phone sex.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
