Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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