Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you win again, gameday.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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