I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Randomize
