Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
