I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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