After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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