there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
