TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
