OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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