I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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