I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize