proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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