bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
