She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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