So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
