Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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