The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
