I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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