what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
