You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
