i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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