hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
