She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize