spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
