I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
