well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Randomize
