I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
