Betty ford says i'm here all night
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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