i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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