If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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