my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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