please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
