is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
