I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
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That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
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So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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