I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize